Thursday, February 28, 2019

MY #NiceTrySmollett in Berlin


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AND THERE I WAS: Walking into an Aldi at 2am in the predominently Turkish and Arab (still 5% German) working-class district of Berlin-Wedding, a Kebab in my hand (at that hour), when I got jumped by a buncha #NeoNazis who hammered me with baseball bats and called me "Yid" and "Jewboy" and "Cis" and "Trumpie" - I think just because I'm so visibly American and Jewish and hetero.

Somewhere a camera must have caught it. But I swear I caught a jackboot to my face, and bleach poured over my ass and a noose tied around my stereotypically Jewish dong, and then they...um...left me there for dead. It was horrible. Of course, I punched one of their asses...y'know...

Then I like, blacked out, before I got up and headed back to the flat so I could tell everyone all about it. I think that was about 2:10 am, but it coulda been 2:15, I'm not sure, I was so traumatized...but the Kebab was still intact and I could finish it as my nerves settled, wiping away my tears with my other hand.

https://scontent.fham1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/52883819_10157253839384114_5734690013505912832_n.jpg?_nc_cat=111&_nc_ht=scontent.fham1-1.fna&oh=b21fbeb190a3c6729808f6c791d582ec&oe=5CE5EE31

"Ya shoulda been there!" ...What am I sayin' - I shoulda been there!

 https://scontent.fham1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/52744564_10157253838714114_7060651876408098816_n.jpg?_nc_cat=102&_nc_ht=scontent.fham1-1.fna&oh=7fe22673c3a56b421341b865dc62894b&oe=5CE196FC


BONUS: Gad Saad -  "I Was Attacked by Jussie Smollett and Three of His Black Friends
(This happened a few minutes ago as I was coming out of the gym.)"


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsDDJlskEHU


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